Feeling a bit down… probably cause i was too high earlier in the day? Attempting to be a bit more social, a bit less antisocial. Still berating myself for being weak and not rejecting the talk for Saturday. I guess it’s a new experience and all, but it doesn’t make the nervousness and all go away. And i’m at this point in time where i would rather present something factual over doing things like these.
Then again, maybe i’m still learning to accept failures, although at the rate my semester has gone, i’m going to screw up and be some disappointment again. Argh.
Okay i’m thinking too much. I can do this. Yes. I can. Maybe. Not like i have a choice… (although we always have a choice but i will always take the easy way out if it was entirely up to me. unfortunately there’s this weirdness to me that i have to do things the hard way so i don’t end up giving up on everything. argh.)
i give up on typing this too.
-shz
hyperactivekidshz 